By Dianne Lively Yost

Nightmare on Main Street. Your award-winnin’ Morgan County Citizen moved its office across the street into that big yellow haunted house that was built in 1890!
    Momma get the sleepin’ bags, candles, snacks, dowsing rods, video camera, martini fixings, EMF meter, Ouija board, sage, automatic writing supplies and holy water!
    Honey that ghost is toast! We’re gonna catch it and get rich sellin’ our real live ghost video to the WORLD!
    Ok we’ll camp in the front room! I’ll set up the motion-activated camera over there so that ghost can’t sneak up on us! Right! First things first! Momma shake us up some martinis! It takes a spirit to catch one! Ok let’s coax the ghost out! Hey ghost!
    If you’re here give us a sign. Ding dang! Momma why in the Sam Hill did you throw that stapler at my head?  What do you mean you didn’t do it? Momma! Put down that martini, put yourself into a trance and try to concentrate.
    Whoa! Don’t look now but there’s a white scary menacin’ mad face floatin’ up there at the top of the stairs! Terminate the mission. Repeat. Terminate the mission!
    Let’s split this sassy séance scene! Run like the wind! Whew! I ran so fast my shoes flat flew off!
    But that’s ok ‘cause Barkin’ Dogs Shoe Co. is now open for business at 125 West Washington Street in downtown Madison!  
    Y’all are gonna love havin’ your very own Morgan County shoe shop! I popped in there just yesterday and Madisonian Vickie Hunt gave me the grand tour and honey in a word it’s – Fab! Ok  . . . Barkin’ Dogs has the world’s most comfy shoe brands! I’m talkin’ Birkinstock, Clarks, dansko, Earth, Finn Comfort MBT, Mephisto, Merrell and UGG!  My fave pair was the MBT – The anti-shoe! I’m sooo gonna me a pair! Oh and Vickie wanted me to tell y’all that she’s offerin’ a layaway plan with 50 percent down and a month to pay it off!
    How perf is that? The best part is that this shop is also gonna sell some fantastic handbags! They’re gonna start comin’ in this week with brands like Whiting & Davis, Eric Javits, Tepper Jackson and Big Buddha! Talk ‘bout Zen! And, y’all are just gonna love the shop’s logo! It was designed by none other than Morgan County’s own famous graphic designer Colleen Hall! Hey and the shop’s interior was done by the famous local team at Madison’s Inside Design!
    Y’all head over there right this minute, check it all out and buy some shoes!
    Hold the phone! Morgan County’s Poet Laureate Col. Dan McHenry Hicky is makin’ a star appearance Saturday, Nov. 8 at Perk Avenue located at 111 West Jefferson Street in Madison for a book signin’ from 4 p.m. until 8 p.m.! Col. Hicky says his book “Madisonians I have Known” is a sort of a Spoon River anthology in rhymin’ verse!
    Hummm . . . let me give that a try: Copy that polecat!
    See ya there on the square! Ding dang I lost my thang!
    I’d best stick with Biz Buzzin’! Anyway, Jolene says Perk Avenue is even gonna have a special menu for the day featurin’ Col. Hicky’s most favulicious meal – slawdogs! Can’t wait!
    I’ll see all y’all there!
    Yikes!  Y’all drive real dang slow in downtown Madison this afternoon ‘cause honey the City of Madison and local businesses are hostin’ the Annual Downtown Trick-or-Treat Thursday, Oct. 30 from 4 p.m. until 5 p.m.! Oh and if your little ghost needs a candy bag, y’all start your trick-or-treatin’ at City Hall located at 132 North Main Street and they’ll flat give you one!
    Hey and don’t forget! Neighborhood Trick-or-Treat is Friday, Oct. 31! Honey Madison Main Street Director Ann Huff says spooks and what not need to finish up by 8 p.m. or else!
    That’s right! Madison police officers will be out in full force makin’ sure those tricks don’t get outta hand!
    That’s it for the Buzz this week! Y’all be sweet to your momma ‘cause she’s the only one you’ll ever have! Load up on candy and have a fun Halloween weekend! I’ll see all y’all next week: Same time.
    Same Number One Weekly Newspaper in the Great State of Georgia!