Momma! Where in the Sam Hill did you get hold of that pot of glittery gold coins? Ding dang! We’ve flat struck it RICH, RICH, RICH . . .I tell ya! Let’s head over to Edward Jones at 149 West Jefferson St. in Madison immediately to find out where to invest our fabulous Money, Money, Money! Hey Doris! What’s shakin’? Yikes! Who in Tarnation just walked outta Mark Bowers’ office?  I know one thing: That stranger’s been shot with the UGLY GUN! Boy Howdy! He’s short with red, Irish hair and ugly, bushy eyebrows and those pointy boots are just flat tacky! Yikes! That there’s a Leapin’ Leprechaun! Momma! He’s tryin’ to get our gold coins! Run! We’ll hide in Town Park by the fountain! What the? This fountain water’s all green and smells like beer! Do you reckon what I reckon? I’ll get the cups! Lord Have Mercy! Momma? Where’d you put the pot o’ gold coins? What do you mean you can’t recollect? Shoot Fire! You musta forgot to pay your brain bill this month!  Oh well . . . let’s do some local shoppin’! Now that gas prices are higher than a Georgia Pine, we can all save a heap of money just by shoppin’ local! Plus when you spend $25 on the 25th, honey you’ll get a chance to win $100! That’s right!

Y’all check out the Shop Local Page in this here Citizen’s Local Color section (10C)! Talk ‘bout boostin’ the local economy! Honey, we’re gonna flat set it on FIRE! OK so here’s how it’s gonna work:  First get your handsome husband’s credit card or cash out his IRA account! Perf! Now check out the Super Fantastic 11 advertisers on Page 10C of this newspaper and spend $25 or more at one or more of these local businesses on March 25! Write your name and phone number on the back of your receipt(s), bring them to the Citizen by March 31 and honey, we’re gonna pull a winner outta the pot for the $100 prize!

OK so this week I’m gonna highlight five of our 11 Shop Local advertisers and next week I’ll highlight the other six to tell all y’all what all you can buy in these fab shops and businesses! First up is Laughing Moon, located at 183 South Main St. in Madison! I mean you can find everything under the sun at the Moon! I love it! OK so I really, really LOVE their TOMS Shoes and new spring fashions! Plus y’all I get all my Biz Buzz 3D notebooks at Laughing Moon! You’ll find jewelry, clothes, unique kitchen gifts, bath and body items, great gifts for kids and MORE! Check it out! It’s gonna be real easy to spend your $25 on the 25th at Laughing Moon!

Lord Have Mercy! The Madison ChopHouse Grille, located at 202 South Main St. in Madison, is gonna do it up right for March 25! I’m talkin’ Slap Yo Momma good! On Friday, March 25 they’re servin’ up a three-course special with Fried Green Tomato Salad, New York Strip topped with Diane Sauce and Faye’s homemade Chocolate Cake! Ding Dang that’s gonna be DELISH! Plus it’s only $25 for all that fancy food!

Madison Produce is where Fresh meets Delish! Located right smack next to the Morgan County Courthouse in Madison, Madison Produce sells local, regional and exotic produce, Johnston Dairy milk, cheeses and yogurts, local honey, artisan breads and more! If you haven’t been over there, Momma’s gonna slap you into next week! Plan to spend $25 or more there on March 25 and your family will LOVE YOU FOR IT! Plus you’ll be eatin’ healthy! Can’t beat that!

Just out of the Kloset at 179 South Main St. in Madison is my absolute FAVE consignment shop! I kid you not! I mean where else would I have found my suede ‘70s jacket! It is flat something else! Oh and they have furniture, dinnerware, glassware, estate jewelry and gifts too! Lord Have Mercy! The prom dresses are really flat beautiful! I mean why go out and spend hundreds and hundreds of dollars when you can buy a beautiful dress that’s been worn once or one that still has its tags! Check it all out y’all! Oh and you can get all their fall and winter clothes for 30 percent off! Ding dang is right! Shopin’ local has never been this dang fun!

Hey and Youngblood Motors, located at 1600 Athens Highway, is offerin’ up a FANTASTIC Shop Local deal! I’m talkin’ The Works! That’s right! An oil change, tire rotation, break inspection, filter check and more for $29.95 or less after the rebate deal! But y’all! Why not just buy that brand spankin’ new car? Yay! Oh and hands off the blue Mustang convertible! That’s mine!

So y’all check out our Shop Local advertisers and let’s show ‘em our support by Shoppin’ Local and spendin’ $25 on March 25!

Yikes! I almost forgot! Get your tickets right smack now for The 12th Taste of Madison this Thursday, St. Patrick's Day, March 17th at the Madison-Morgan Cultural Center Hall.  Tickets are$20 per person.  Call the Chamber at (706) 342-4454 or stop by to get your tickets! Hey and the Biz Buzz has six tickets so you can flat pop over to the Citizen, buy your tickets and buy your full-page ad at the same time! OK so the line-up this year is flat yummy! Smokin' Gun BBQ, Little Phillies, FARMeander, The IceHouse Restaurant, Claudia's European Coffee Shop, Blue Willow Inn, Ella's Sweet Shoppe, Chick-fil-A, Madison ChopHouse Grille, The Caboose, Tequila Express, Scoops, Perk Avenue, Yesterday Cafe, Amici, Coca Cola, Bonner's, Pizza Hut, Big Kev's BBQ, Wendy's and Kentucky Fried Chicken. I’ll see all y’all there! Ding dang! I’m done!

Printed in the March 17, 2011 edition